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3 Ways to Build Your Influence

Here’s the truth

The lid to your team is built on the lid of your influence.

If we want to lead level 10 teams and create a game-changing culture for our organization, we must look at our leadership from a holistic perspective.

Here are 3 keys to deepen your overall leadership skills as a whole.

#1: Ego/Entitlement is your greatest enemY

Ego has taken more leaders out than anything, and I mean that.

Ego and pride are 98% of the problems, but we love to blame other things.

Here are just a FEW things that are the result of ego and entitlement.

  1. Company Splits

  2. People quitting

  3. Power struggle

  4. Lack of listening to teams

One of the key reasons this happens is it goes against everything that leadership is about. When we look at the model of some of the greatest leaders to ever live on this planet typically they carried these qualities.

  1. Selflessness

  2. Service

  3. Vision

  4. Sacrifice

A true leader that believes in their team and their vision will also sacrifice their ego for what they see. Jesus showed us the greatest example of leadership by SERVING others and investing in their life.

A couple of weeks ago I did an exercise with my staff.

I had them all get out a piece of paper and remember the reasons they wanted to get into leadership. As they all took their time, here were the answers they shared.

  1. Change lives

  2. Help people live to their potential

  3. Transform communities

  4. Empower leaders

  5. Unleash purpose and calling

  6. Serve the underserved

Notice it had nothing to do about THEM. It was all about the vision and mission in service to others. But somewhere along the way leaders begin to lose focus on the WHY. They start focussing on WHO has the right answer and if THEY are the ones that needs to be looked at as successful.

Sadly we all have watched recently one of the largest churches in the WORLD; Hillsong, struggle with leadership and corruption. I won’t go into much detail here about what happened, but it was ugly to say the least.

Now, do you think some of those leaders started with some of those things in their heart? I genuinely believe no. Most leaders when they begin with similar things that were stated above. To help people and be a part of changing something for the better. But the poison of pride, ego, and entitlement is a slippery slope in leaders. And if we’re not careful we will go down with it.

#2: Pursue Honor

Honor is powerful, yet rarely seen in western civilization. Anyone that looks at me and shares they got to where they are by themselves is lying.

We all need help.

We all needed a mentor, teacher, coach, boss, or parent that helped us in some form or fasion.

It may have been a friend that recommended you for a job, or a boss that took a chance on you. I don’t care who you are, people have been helping you on some level your whole entire life. I believe mature leaders understand honor.

When you are leading your meetings, do you honor the leaders that you follow or do you trash them behind their back?

When was the last time you said thank you to those who gave you a chance?

Honor is a POWERFUL and Godly principle that earns trust, shows humility, and makes everything easier when you work with people.

But you can only honor people when you are secure.

Insecurities in leaders take away their joy to uphold people and encourage them. Empathy also goes a long way when it comes to honoring people.

The leaders that are above you deal with a lot. And I can understand if they are not the best, or they have messed up. But they also have stress that many of us have never had to deal with. They may be dealing with politics, or a bad board, or worse.

One time a mentor of mine said,

“you will never know the full weight of a seat until you sit in it.”

#3: Being the Loudest doesn’t make you the Leader

Just because you’re loud doesn’t make you the leader. I find so many people think that bossing people around somehow equals influence. This is not true. Now don’t get me wrong, command is a powerful thing and done right can have an effect on people.

Communication is a vital part of leadership, but influence is much more complicated than that.

Do you remember when you were in the 3rd grade and your teacher would say something like “We’re not going to recess until everyone is quiet!” And though this was a solid offer, the class continued to talk loudly. And then that one kid got sick and tired of it and started screaming at the others? Do you remember this? Or was this just me?

Most of the kids would roll their eyes, but they would start to stop for a second.

But also in that group there was a kid in the class that everyone copied, mimicked, and followed even if they would lead them to trouble.

The first kid is what people THINK LEADERSHIP IS, the second is what REAL INFLUENCE looks like.

People think if they yell, scream, and point fingers at people that will earn influence. And it might affect something for a short term.

But what you lose overtime with this method is respect. And respect has nothing to do with your voice, and everything to do with your influence.

Influence and respect is an art to learn and to forge overtime.

They can’t be created by skill alone but by a variety of tools and characteristics.

Here are some things that can earn you TRUE respect as a leader.

  1. Experience

  2. Hard work

  3. Admitting to being wrong

  4. Modeling your vision

  5. Empowering

  6. Coaching

  7. Passion

  8. Heart

  9. Love

  10. Care

  11. Patience

  12. Humility

  13. Honor

  14. Capacity

  15. Family health

  16. Habits

And that’s just the start!

Influence is complex, and you can’t boss your way into it.

Hope this helps you all.

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